5 Ways To Not Kill Your Husband

Sometimes, I want to kill my husband. Due to laws in the United States (and the possibility of life imprisonment), that can not happen. These are 5 ways how not to kill your husband

All you need is love.  It’s a Beatles song, it has to be true — right?

Lies.  Love surely isn’t all you need.  I loved my husband with my whole heart when we got married.  I love my kids with my whole heart!…

If you are feeling the stress of the times — it is NORMAL to have negative feelings towards your partner. I find that simplifying priorities is the key — and I really do that in my course Family Routines:

But there are times when I consider if there are ways I could kill them without going to jail.  I’m just too cute for jail and attempted murder isn’t cute.  I’m not saying that I really want to kill them (domestic violence is no joke), but I’m just tired.  I’m tired of being a support and a helper, and… well, did I mention I’m tired? I’ve been tired for a long time.

Sometimes marriage can be SO rough, even if you’re married to your best friend.  This has been an especially rough time for our family and I’m really proud of the fact that we’re sticking with things and haven’t lost our minds yet.  At least not entirely. 🙂

My husband and myself actually did a podcast on ways we’re connecting when we can’t go out (recorded during Covid) — but maybe something will ring true to you:

How to NOT kill your husband

So, to start this month of love out, I’d love to share 5 Way to Not Kill Your Husband.  You’ll have to email me to find out the ways TO kill them.  I’m a nurse.  We have our ways. 😉 {evil witch laugh}

Get away from him

I’m not talking about a legal separation here, you don’t need THAT much space.  I’m talking about a day with the girls, an evening with the girls even just something you do ALONE.  My husband and I are both home full time right now.  It’s kind of ridiculous.  I went from NEVER seeing him to being able to call his name at any time.

Let’s just say it’s taken some getting used to (and we even have an office with a door he can go to).  I have a great post on how to plan a girls trip that you might find interesting (it was overwhelming to plan, but SO worth it!).  Or, do a getaway with them!  That always helps!  Looking for the best hotel at the best price — don’t forget Trip Advisor!  Pick a city you want to visit and see if there’s any awesome deals RIGHT NOW. 🙂

If you are really THAT angry, perhaps a night at a hotel will help you relax and think about your personal priorities….

Make a list of things you love about them to not kill your husband

There are days you might have to reach pretty deep to find these things.  Being married doesn’t mean that you love everything about this person.  It means you try to.  So, start making the list.  

My husband is the calm to my storm.  I always try to remember that.  Maybe get a cute notebook — like this one — that you could start to fill with all those loving thoughts.

But I also want to say that his calm deliberate life often drives me INSANE. I want action and he’s a thinker before he acts. So, I get it. 😉

Put on headphones to not kill your husband

This is my new one.  Sometimes I just bang out to some music to forget about my life, my husband and my kids.  I have a few select songs I love REALLY loud, and somehow this takes some of my negative energy and processes it for me in minutes.  I love a good Bluetooth pair. So next time, just pop in your headphones and rock out for a little bit.

Set up date nights to not kill your husband

We have NOT been good at date nights lately.  Probably because we are both home all the time.  BUT, that doesn’t mean we don’t need a little chips and salsa every now and then.

We love going to Alamo Cinemas (a gift card is also a nice gift to give each other) — as it’s always fun to laugh together and enjoy some tasty food!

Also, be sure to check that podcast out. Lots of good ideas (many of which are very cheap). The Gottman’s book on Eight Dates has been really transformative for us (and REALLY cheap compared to therapy). We actually read it on Scribd (and I can get you a few months free).

See other people to not kill your husband

I’m not talking about THAT kind of seeing other people.  I’m talking about going out with friends and seeing your husband in a relaxed social situation vs your tense home life.  It can help you see them in the way you saw them when you were dating and get you back in a better place. {twooo-wove}

I remember when we were first married.  I went to a church that was all newlyweds.  Everyone loved their husband SO much.  They talked about how perfect they, and their love was.  

I figured I was married to a monster, until I just started asking a few friends if their marriage was that perfect.  I mainly got a lot of eye rolls…. The reality is that marriage can be really tough.

Ok, let’s talk about the people searching for this:

I want to kill my husband.

Yup, we’ve all been there.  A few things to think about:

1.  We’ve all been there.  Don’t feel alone — like everyone else’s marriage is perfect.  We are all struggling!
2.  It’s not always like this.  There are always low parts, high parts, and lots of plot twists.  Just remember that.
3.  It’s not worth it.  If they are really taking so much effort that you want them dead, don’t give them the rest of your life in jail too.  Get help, and move on.

Pregnant and Want to Kill My Husband

First thing, SO normal.

Your role is SO much more painful, and daily than his.

I would recommend getting him involved.

A lot of time, men just need an action to take (vs having a talk or feeling feelings) — and that course will help them do that! I also have a full post on being a supportive husband during pregnancy you could send them.

I would also take a minute to be in his shoes. Having no control. Not getting to feel the baby move. It’s MUCH less real to them. I feel sorry for dads, some of the time.

That didn’t stop me from googling local lawyers with the American bar association with my last baby after my husband wouldn’t rub my feet.

If you liked this post you’ll enjoy my endless amounts of love post, check it out too it’s a good story.

This post was originally written in Feb of 2015, and has been updated.