The Marathon of Motherhood with Joan Kimmel — PCP 028

Motherhood is long. A long, long time and it can be overwhelming to think of the whole spectrum, but I also think it’s really important that we do just that — to remember that there are many ups and downs but it’s a long-term game that we have to keep our eye on the horizon.

Today’s guest is Joan Kimmel, and yes — she had that famous last name first. She’s the mom of Jimmy Kimmel from the late night show Jimmy Kimmel Live. But, to me she was just a volunteer with our carnival for a couple of years before I figured it out. 🙂

Big thanks to our sponsor Family Routines — it’s a great option if you’re wanting to prioritize your life, get your family involved in keeping your house and otherwise stay sane. Be sure to use the coupon code mentioned in the episode.

Talked about in the episode:

• Running your school’s carnival
• Jimmy Kimmel Spelling Bee
• The Serious Goose {all proceeds go to children’s hospitals}
• Your Mom Cares Group
• Joan makes PB&J for the Oscars

Other things you might find helpful:

• Learning to Let Go
• Why did your child come to you?
• Positive Affirmations for Kids

Producer: Drew Erickson

Check out my other parenting podcasts:

Check out all my podcasts:

Hilary Erickson 0:00
Hey guys, welcome back to the Pulling Curls Podcast. Today on Episode 28, I’ve got a celebrity! Okay, she’s not actually a celebrity. Her son is and it’s kind of a roundabout way that we know each other. But guys, I’ve reached the bid time. Today we’re going to talk about kind of the marathon of parenting. How we are in it for the long haul. And I just think she has a really interesting perspective. So let’s untangle it.

Welcome to the Pulling Curls Podcast where we untangle everything from pregnancy, parenting, home routines, even some family travel because, heavens knows! Our lives are tangled. I’m your host, Hilary Erickson.

I know, you’re all impressed that I could get a celebrity guest, right? Again, she’s not actually a celebrity, but her son definitely is a celebrity. We actually met when I ran our school’s Carnival. When we moved to Arizona, that first year I helped run our school Carnival, which was insane and I wouldn’t really recommend it to anyone. She’s definitely a high point of running the school’s Carnival but she helped get volunteers for the carnival from the high school and the junior high. And I think we were together maybe two years before somebody said, you know, she’s Jimmy’s mom. And I was like, No, she’s Alison’s grandma. And they were like, no, but she’s Jimmy’s mom. And I was like, You must have her confused with somebody else. And they were like, no. Jimmy Kimmel, and I was like, wha? And again, I’m a early bedtime girl. Then I was like, oh, I think he’s on Late Night, right? Don’t tell Joan. So, so embarrassing. Then I started to watch it a little bit, and he’s one of my favorites. I think he’s so funny. But Joan is definitely more of my favorite. We have just kept being friends and she’s so nice. And, I actually think she’s one of the hardest workers I know. I’ve always been so impressed by her. Even though she could sit back and live in the lap of luxury of being Jimmy Kimmel’s mom. She is out there. She’s supporting celebrity mom causes which, who knew they were a thing. But, she’s also so supportive of all of her kids and her grandkids. I just think it’s super impressive. Joan is so generous. In fact, we stayed at her house ones in California. We got there late one night, I think my youngest was actually already asleep and we put her to sleep and then she woke up and she was looking at the walls and she She was like, why is Jimmy Kimmel everywhere in this house? And I was like, well, because Joan is Jimmy’s mom. And she was like, why? She was so confused because I think it’s interesting that we view him as a celebrity whereas he’s really just Joan’s little boy. Little Jimmy Kimmel. Anyway, today I want to introduce you to my friend Joan Kimmel.

This episode of the Pulling Curls Podcast is sponsored by family routines, how to automate your housewife life. Ever wish life was more like you pictured it would be before you had kids? Being able to spend less time with a mundane task and more time teaching kids the fun and valuable life skills you know they need. Family Routines teaches families to simplify daily tasks into routines that help them feel more peace and joy. Say 15% with the coupon code UNTANGLED. You can find it at pullingcurls.com in the menu under COURSES, or in this episode’s show notes.

Hey, Joan, welcome to the podcast!

Joan Kimmel 2:53
Yes! So much fun!

Hilary Erickson 2:56
So I’ve already introduced you, Joan.

Joan Kimmel 2:58
Yeah, you did.

Hilary Erickson 2:59
I don’t introduce people In front of them, but. And again, Joan and I have been friends for a while. Yeah, we just…

Joan Kimmel 3:04
I fell in love with you immediately.

Hilary Erickson 3:05
Well, most people do. Yeah. So Joan, you have three kids.

Joan Kimmel 3:11
I do.

Hilary Erickson 3:11
And lots of grandkids. How many grandkids?

Joan Kimmel 3:14
Eight.

Hilary Erickson 3:15
Eight. Well, that’s not lots.

Joan Kimmel 3:16
Well, by my standards, it is. By my old Italian grandparents. It’s not- they had like 14 kids, you know, that kind of thing.

Hilary Erickson 3:25
Yeah. All right. So what was the best part about raising kids?

Joan Kimmel 3:29
Their wonder. I love that… I love telling a kid a joke and he gets it. That’s, that’s our standard in the family. Like we can tell a kid a joke. And they realize they’ve been told- that they should laugh. Yeah. That was, that was really probably the best thing. That was our thing. Like most people are like, ABCs. No, we’re Knock knock. And yeah, that’s our family.

Hilary Erickson 3:55
Well worked out for you, but did Yeah. What was the worst part about raising kids?

Joan Kimmel 4:00
Having a teenage daughter.

Hilary Erickson 4:03
Oh, that’s gonna be the end of my parenting. Although it was end of yours. Wait, Jill’s the youngest right?

Joan Kimmel 4:08
No, Jonathan is.

Hilary Erickson 4:09
Oh, mmkay.

Joan Kimmel 4:11
Yeah, teenage daughters are difficult for… Well anyway mine. Mine was and it might have been me! Might not have been her. Might have been me.

Hilary Erickson 4:18
Or the combination.

Joan Kimmel 4:20
Yeah. Yeah. You know, we both were at loggerheads. Maybe we’re too much alike.

Hilary Erickson 4:25
Yeah, that’s probably true. All right. So what do you miss most about having kids in your own house? Like, your kids.

Joan Kimmel 4:33
It’s just giggle time. It’s just fun. And I never see Dora the Explorer anymore.

Hilary Erickson 4:38
Hopefully no one sees Dora the Explorer anymore. Although there’s the movie. Did you see the movie?

Joan Kimmel 4:42
No.

Hilary Erickson 4:42
I haven’t seen it either.

Joan Kimmel 4:43
No, live action Dora. Mmm. Sorry. Swiper no swiping. It just doesn’t, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Dora the castle’s over there! Turn around.

Hilary Erickson 4:55
Oh, Dora. Yeah. So Dora the Explorer is what you miss most.

Joan Kimmel 4:58
Not most, but it’s hard to- how do you pick something. What do you miss most. Oh, I know. I miss having them fall asleep in my arms.

Hilary Erickson 5:08
Oh. That happened about six times total in my motherhood life.

Joan Kimmel 5:12
Really?

Hilary Erickson 5:12
My kids were not cuddlers.

Joan Kimmel 5:13
Oh, yeah, I still get in. Now Christian-James is 19 and he’s a grandson. I still go in there and sing his song to him at night when he’s …when he’s near.

Hilary Erickson 5:24
Oh, you do?

Joan Kimmel 5:25
I do. I think to Alison, she’s 17. They like it.

Hilary Erickson 5:29
Do Jane and Billy have songs?

Joan Kimmel 5:30
Now they have songs. Yes.

Hilary Erickson 5:32
Did you have songs with the older grandkids?

Joan Kimmel 5:35
Yeah. And with my kids. Always singing to them at night, never put them to sleep crying. I don’t like that.

Hilary Erickson 5:40
I think if I sang to my kids, some of them might cry.

Joan Kimmel 5:46
That’s the thing about kids. They’re dumb. They think you sound good.

Hilary Erickson 5:50
Yeah, that’s true.

Joan Kimmel 5:51
Yeah, they’re not smart.

Hilary Erickson 5:52
So, I just thought of another question. So, my daughter was in the spelling bee today. I needed some Xanax during it. I always do. We’ve had kids in the spelling bee before. So, and I was thinking of you. And you have Jimmy like, up on the stage at the Oscars. How’s that? Do you need a Xanax before that?

Joan Kimmel 6:07
No, I don’t ever take drugs. So, it wouldn’t work. I don’t even know what Xanax does. But no. Um…

Hilary Erickson 6:14
Do you get nervous though?

Joan Kimmel 6:15
Sometimes I get butterflies. But now… but I’ve been like that for all the kids no matter what they’re doing. It isn’t just because you know, people are watching. Big people, you know, numerous people are watching. You always want the best for your kids. You always want them to do their best. So that’s why your nervousness is no more or less than- than- the- you know, the feeling you- I have when one of my kids is doing something performing. Because they all perform. So Jill’s doing stand up and I want her to do her best because it’ll make her feel good. Not because it’ll make me feel good. And, Jonathan, you know, he’s got the cranky anchors, and he’s, he’s a singer. He’s somebody you would love Drew. And he, he’s a theater nut. And so his kids loved theater. His wife loves theater. They’re all, you know, they’ve seen them is a million times. And taken me to see Hamilton. My two little grandchildren. Nine years old and seven years old. Know everywhere to Hamilton and…

Hilary Erickson 7:13
Wow,

Joan Kimmel 7:13
Yeah, they’re really. They love it.

Hilary Erickson 7:16
So soon you’ll be… grandkids. Do you think you’ll be as anxious with grandkids doing things?

Joan Kimmel 7:20
Well, I know I’m going to go see Wes and Trixie being- uh what are their names? I’ve never able been able to sit through Frozen. I think it’s one of the worst things I’ve ever seen. Pardon me, everybody, but I think Trixie’s going to be Elsa and Wes is going to be whatever, uh the boyfriend. Yeah, no.

Hilary Erickson 7:40
Obviously we’re showing our Frozen knowledge.

Joan Kimmel 7:42
Yeah, I don’t know.

Hilary Erickson 7:43
Well, that’s exciting.

Joan Kimmel 7:44
Yeah. That was unendurable that song.

Hilary Erickson 7:49
Poor Joan. You’re. Well you should be glad that you didn’t have- because Paige was like right in the middle of the Frozen.

Joan Kimmel 7:55
We’ve got a lot of little kids in the family and believe me, we had numerous Frozen children.

Hilary Erickson 8:00
Frozen children. HA!

Joan Kimmel 8:01
Yes.

Hilary Erickson 8:03
Well, you know. Paige, I think woke up to the Frozen song for a full year. So it would be every time she woke up. Yeah, Let it go.

Joan Kimmel 8:11
Yeah, letting-

Hilary Erickson 8:13
Let it go. Get up.

Joan Kimmel 8:14
We let it go really.

Hilary Erickson 8:16
Elsa needs to sing a song called get up. Get up and go to school. Maybe we could ask her to sing that.

Joan Kimmel 8:23
Get an A, get an A

Hilary Erickson 8:27
Don’t let your chemistry go away. Yeah, I did touch kristen bell’s bottom once, so we’re pretty close. She’s at mom 2.0

Joan Kimmel 8:35
She’s a nice person.

Hilary Erickson 8:37
She is. Okay, so you’re saying that my anxiety may have peaked at the…

Joan Kimmel 8:41
Your anxiety. Perfectly normal. What you have to do is, because all you’re doing is. You’re nervous for her because you want her to feel good about herself.

Hilary Erickson 8:50
I want her to have a good experience. That’s all I care about.

Joan Kimmel 8:52
So, but you’re nervous. This isn’t going to help her do better anyway. So you’re gonna have to give that up. Let it go.

Hilary Erickson 8:59
Let it go.

Joan Kimmel 9:01
Yeah, you being nervous doesn’t make it better.

Hilary Erickson 9:04
No. It makes me want to die. Yeah I just get there and think. yeah and I’m worse at the spelling because I had a bad spelling new experience of my own so I had the experience bad

Joan Kimmel 9:12
You get stung by a spelling bee?

Hilary Erickson 9:14
Yes, I did.

Joan Kimmel 9:15
Did you- tell us about it.

Hilary Erickson 9:16
Instead of- so my word was Kiwi and it was like the first round and I said ki wi and I thought I had said k but they bounced me.

Joan Kimmel 9:25
Key is not a letter. So I mean, they may have said, “Can you spell that again please?” So

Hilary Erickson 9:31
They can’t do that though. It was the school spelling bee. Anyway, I cried.

Joan Kimmel 9:36
The mean school spelling bee.

Hilary Erickson 9:37
Many, many tears. Over Key- I- W- I. I don’t- I don’t get as nervous. Yeah, we were thinking of Jimmy’s spelling bee. If you guys haven’t seen Jimmy’s spelling bee things. Look them up on YouTube. Jimmy Kimmel spelling bee. because they are hilarious.

Joan Kimmel 9:42
Yeah, he competes against the winners of the spelling bee competitions every year.

Hilary Erickson 9:54
That’s not the funny part though. The funny part was Guillermo judge. So he pronounces them however he wants.

Joan Kimmel 10:00
Well, however he’s capable of.

Hilary Erickson 10:06
All right. Do you have advice for moms who feel like their kid’s failing and isn’t going to make anything of themselves? Have you ever worried?

Joan Kimmel 10:12
I owned one of those.

Hilary Erickson 10:16
Well, we’ve all owned them from time to time.

Joan Kimmel 10:17
I mean, Jimmy went from job to job, he got fired more times than I can count on both hands and toes. Honestly, he went from radio station to radio station, they kept telling him he was too original, I guess, but they. He didn’t fit their mold. You know, he wasn’t the ‘morning zoo.’ You know, he had his own kind of humor, but he believed in himself. No thanks to me.

Hilary Erickson 10:42
I’m sure that was thanks to you.

Joan Kimmel 10:44
Nah, he was yeah, he had confidence that what he was doing was good. And, and he never cared whether or not. He never really cared about being famous. He just liked working. Yeah. And so that was it.

Hilary Erickson 10:58
That’s awesome. What about you, though? How did you? Did you overcome those feelings after a while? Did you worry? You worried. I’m sure.

Joan Kimmel 11:06
Well, then he got married. They didn’t have children right away. They were married like four years before they had Katie, but that, you know, that’s concerning when when you’re married and you have a family and your job keeps going away after a year. Yeah, you know, that’s hard. It’s- It is hard. But I always had I had confidence in him. I never. Even at one point. They lived with us for eight months. He left Seattle, he was fired from the radio station and feet in Seattle, and he came home. I said, Come home, stay, you know, you don’t want to pay rent and all that junk. And so they did and then he he got hired in Florida and he went to Florida.

Hilary Erickson 11:06
Wow. He hit all the coasts.

Joan Kimmel 11:48
Kind of did no he didn’t work in New York. Yeah. Then from Florida, he went to Palm Springs from Palm Springs went to Los Angeles and then from Los Angeles, ben stein discovered her many went on Ben Stein’s money. And the rest is history right kind of the man show. Here’s the thing. Well from ben stein, he got the man show and from the man show he got whatever it is he’s on now.

Hilary Erickson 12:12
The Oscars some. Although I don’t think the Oscars would pay many bills. It sounds like head.

Joan Kimmel 12:19
Hey is terrible.

Hilary Erickson 12:20
Yeah, it really is. Oh no, right. Not good. I mean, I would take it there would be wrong. Yeah. If they needed me to host I would do it. All right. Yeah. All right. For the price. You don’t get a free dress or anything. I could probably get a sponsor dress.

Joan Kimmel 12:32
You probably good probably this woman that you guys who are listening to this podcast, this woman. She got herself a free husband. It was unbelievable. She wrote such intriguing things on her

Hilary Erickson 12:46
pulling curls. And this guy. She was married when I started it just so everybody knows. Yeah. And I went to BYU. There’s plenty of free hugs.

Joan Kimmel 12:54
You went to get you Mrs. Yeah,

Hilary Erickson 12:55
that’s right. Okay, what’s the best part about having a celebrity You have a family the best part?

Joan Kimmel 13:01
Yeah, you get to do fun things that you didn’t know you like, going to the Oscars, right? Who would What? I’m sitting in front of Steven Spielberg. And I had baked cookies for the family. Because they are always hungry when they’re at those things because they don’t eat. I mean, they don’t need weeks, right? Because you want to make the dress, right. And so I bring food and I had baked cookies that looked like the Oscar, of course. And Steven Spielberg was sitting behind us and he was like, Cool cookies, because I gave him to some kid that was sitting in the room and he said that lady and

Hilary Erickson 13:39
so did you give him an Oscar cookie? I did.

Joan Kimmel 13:41
I didn’t. Several of them. Wow. He liked them.

Hilary Erickson 13:46
You always have treats in your bag. Not always. You offer me a lollipop. One I know. Yeah.

Joan Kimmel 13:51
Your mom was cute. Yeah, she doing She’s good. Thank that’s because she’s my mom.

Hilary Erickson 13:57
Remember Jill and your teenage daughter. Oh, Like that never leaves me. So I saw Jimmy has a serious goose if you guys haven’t checked it out, it’s such a cute book. If you look it up on YouTube, you can see him reading it to his kids. It’s a cute book for kids. It doesn’t like

Joan Kimmel 14:12
a cute book. It’s a book that actually has impact socially, because all the money every penny is going to children’s hospitals all across the United States. Yeah, very proud of that.

Hilary Erickson 14:25
And it’s a really cute book. It doesn’t sometimes you read those books, and it’s a lot about the hospital or something like oh, that’s really just about a fun kids book. So you guys should check it out. And Joan, you said you’re part of the your mom cares group where it’s celebrity moms helping out people

Joan Kimmel 14:40
feel so celebratory,

Unknown Speaker 14:42
celebratory?

Joan Kimmel 14:44
Yeah. And what you find out when you’re in groups like this, the format is good simply because I mean, the platform bit more than the format the platform is good just because for some reason people want to do stuff for you because they think they know you Your kid, so hit him up for a few bucks for charity. Right? And that’s pretty much what it is. These are women, great women who have created this organization and they were kind enough to invite me. Just because Jimmy, Jimmy and we do organization we do things raising funds for mental health issues for young people for just, it’s not one issue. It’s okay. This year, we’re going to focus on children with cancer,

Hilary Erickson 15:28
right? But you’re gonna put all your force behind one issue, right important to everybody. Right? And, and

Joan Kimmel 15:33
because everybody’s got different things that touch their heart. You know, if you knew someone who committed suicide, you would want to be in a mental health awareness group and or depression, you know, like to help people with those issues. And a lot of these issues are things that don’t get looked at by the great you know, everybody wants to do the American Heart Association, right? Because we understand that but especially mental health issues are Usually swept under the rug. So things like that. That’s great homeless people, unwed mothers abused people that a lot of the stuff people don’t really want to think about.

Hilary Erickson 16:10
Yeah, yeah. Well, that’s awesome.

Joan Kimmel 16:12
Yeah, it is, is we’re fortunate we’re blessed. Yeah, we really are. Well, maybe

Hilary Erickson 16:17
they asked you because you’re a hard worker could be because I did do the carnival with john for like, two years without having any idea who, whose celebratory she was? Well, you know,

Joan Kimmel 16:26
and I just made her do work. Then I started wearing that somebody

Hilary Erickson 16:30
else mom Leave me alone. It wouldn’t have mattered to me. I needed help with the carnival, which is probably why I fell in love with you. priorities. That’s it. Yeah. All right, john, thanks so much for coming on. We really appreciate it being here. Thank you. Bye. Okay, guys, I hope you really enjoyed the episode today. I just think it’s really interesting to see like how parenting goes through the ages, especially for someone that we all know, just to know that there were times when she was like, Oh, are you ever going to get it together and then later on, you know, He brings her to the Oscars. I don’t know if you guys remember but on the Oscars, she actually made peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for the attendees. If you look it up on YouTube, you can see it but it’s just kind of fun to see that we you know, we all worry about our kids and how they’re going to be successful and if they’ll be able to take care of their families later on and Joan has always reminded me that you just never know and staying positive and being supportive of your kids is one of the most important things that you can do. If you’d like to know more about parenting I actually have a practical parenting series that you guys can check out I’ll have it in the show notes you can go to pulling curls. com backslash podcast. Today’s episode is number 28. Big thanks to our sponsor family routines. If you are looking to get your house into a routine that makes it easier to deal with the times when things are crazy, I think you will really like family routines. Again it will be in the show notes or you can find it anywhere on my website under courses. Big thanks to my friend john for coming on. We actually recorded this episode twice. She was one of my first guests and the first recording just did not turn out and she was so generous to come back and do it again. And so that is awesome. If you’d like today’s episode I would love it if you would leave a review on wherever you listen to podcasts, it really means a lot and it helps other people to find me. Also if you’re interested in subscribing most podcast players you can just hit subscribe and it will notify you when there is a new podcast for pulling curls podcast those happen every Monday and until then I hope you have a tangle free day.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai