The Journey of Infertility: Struggle, Success, and Spearmint Tea

In this episode of the Erickson Creative podcast, host Hilary Erickson is joined by guests John and Morgan Fulton as they share their journey with infertility, pregnancy, and childbirth. After six years of trying to conceive, the couple’s persistence and research led them to find a solution that ultimately resulted in a successful pregnancy. Hilary also highlights the importance of being prepared for childbirth and announces a sponsored online prenatal class for couples that covers everything from pregnancy to infant care. Stay tuned for an inspiring and informative conversation.

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Today’s guests are Jon and Morgan. After 6 plus years of trying to conceive, countless inseminations and finally a more holistic approach, they have finally welcomed their first child in March of this year. With so many years actively trying, they had plenty of time to prepare as much as possible so that when the time came, they’d be ready. They knew they wanted an online prenatal course and after reading many positive reviews and recommendations, enter Hilary with Pulling Curls. A must for any soon-to-be parents.

Big thanks to our sponsor The Online Prenatal Class for Couples — if you want to know about your birth, it is the class for you!

[00:00:00] Infertility journey, labor, and cute baby.

[00:03:32] PCOS, weight gain, bad fertility treatment, spearmint tea.

[00:07:14] Appreciate people, infertility struggles, and loving daughter.

[00:10:32] Preparation, prenatal course instilled confidence, comfortable.

[00:12:50] Class for planners focused on natural childbirth.

[00:19:01] Scar tissue in cervix can hinder stretching.

[00:20:55] Parenting: simple things now require planning. Relationship dynamics shift.

[00:24:55] Changing table and slings have mixed opinions.

[00:27:38] Morgan’s childbirth experience is indescribable and emotional.

[00:32:07] Infertility discussed, comment on Instagram for discussion.

Producer: Drew Erickson

Keywords:

speaker, complaining, pregnancy, timeframe, love, experience, beautiful, infertility, struggle, PCOS, Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, weight gain, bad experience, Insemination, holistic approach, spearmint tea, testosterone, remedies, saw palmetto, milk thistle, vitamins, research, physical books, online sources, androgens, high testosterone, facilitation, release of eggs, podcast, Pulling Curls, Hilary, nurse, mother, infertility, childbirth, sponsored, online prenatal class, couples, birth experience, guests, Morgan, John, journey, relationship, complications, endocrinologist, methods, tracking, menstrual cycle, calendar, basal body temperature, temping, medication, metformin, class, planners, hospital, mom conference, childbirth educators, natural childbirth, appreciation, struggles, pelvis split, difficulty, baby, Instagram, conversation, being prepared, gratitude, infant care, review, share, subscribe, challenges, taking care, dishes, laundry, baby’s needs, relationship, annoyed, list, event, prenatal class, confidence, unanswered questions, comfortable, prepared, body issues.

Transcript

Hilary Erickson [00:00:00]:

Hey, guys, welcome back to the Pulling Curls Podcast. Today we are following a couple’s journey with infertility through delivery. Let’s untangle it. Hi, I’m Hilary, a serial overcomplicator. I’m also a nurse, mom to three and the curly head behind Pulling Curls and the pregnancy nurse. This podcast aims to help us stop overcomplicating things and remember how much easier it is to keep things simple. Let’s smooth out those snarls with pregnancy and parenting untangled, the Pulling Curls Podcast.

Okay, today’s guest, they had six years plus of infertility, ended up getting pregnant, preparing for their labor and delivery, and then having a super cute little baby boy. I want to introduce today’s guests, Morgan and John.

This episode is sponsored by the online prenatal class for couples. If you guys are looking to get prepared and you like to know what’s going to happen along your journey, the online prenatal class for couples is 100% the class for you. I want you guys to have a great birth just like Morgan and John. So come join me and in just a few hours we can get you prepared from bump to bassinet.

Hey, guys, welcome to the Pulling Curls Podcast.

Morgan [00:01:21]:

Thank you so much.

Hilary Erickson [00:01:22]:

Hi there. Okay, so we’ve got John and Morgan. What’s baby’s name?

Morgan [00:01:25]:

Lachlan Lee.

Hilary Erickson [00:01:26]:

Lachlan Lee. Last name? You’re right, that’s not his last name. Yeah. Lachlan Lee’s. Middle name. Okay, so cute. LL. Do you call him LL?

Morgan [00:01:35]:

No. We call him Locky.

Hilary Erickson [00:01:38]:

My kids nicknames never… I don’t know. That is something you don’t think about before you have the baby.

Morgan [00:01:44]:

But they all yeah, we didn’t think about nicknames, but now we’ve got Locky, locky-pooh, just all kinds of ridiculous.

John [00:01:53]:

We’re very nicknaming people for better or worse. I call him Buggles because he’s my snuggle buggle.

Hilary Erickson [00:01:58]:

That’s right. Yeah.

Morgan [00:01:59]:

Smunch smunch.

Hilary Erickson [00:02:01]:

Our first one I called Bug for a long time. I do not call him Bug at 23, though. So things do change, just so you know.

John [00:02:08]:

Yeah, I’ve started to abbreviate Buggles as Bug in the last couple of days.

Hilary Erickson [00:02:12]:

And it was hard because sometimes I called him that because he bugged me.

John [00:02:19]:

And Lock has a built in nickname for that Loch Ness monster.

Hilary Erickson [00:02:24]:

Oh, perfect.

John [00:02:28]:

Spelled the same way too. That’s funny.

Hilary Erickson [00:02:30]:

Okay, so you guys had some infertility before getting pregnant with this little guy. How long? Anything you want to share about that journey?

Morgan [00:02:37]:

Oh, yeah. So we were actively trying for six years and I mean kind of inactively trying for six plus. We’ve been in a long term relationship for about 20 years and we were just like, hey, you know what? If it happens, it happens. And then we’re like, okay, we’re going to get serious about this. About six years ago and didn’t know we had any kind of complications. We’ve done the calendar, the temping. After that we went on to medication, metformin from my endocrinologist, who’s the one that actually told me I had PCOS and then that didn’t do anything. It actually raised my testosterone.

Hilary Erickson [00:03:22]:

Bodies are amazing.

John [00:03:24]:

They are so intuitive.

Hilary Erickson [00:03:26]:

Yeah.

Morgan [00:03:26]:

And you get 50 pounds with it-

Hilary Erickson [00:03:28]:

-You’re like, Hooray! Thank you so much.

Morgan [00:03:32]:

Right? And I couldn’t get the PCOS that makes you skinny. No, I couldn’t get that one. I had to get the PCOS that gives you 50 pounds every year. And then after that, we had some Insemination, which was a horror story. Just really bad experience with that. That didn’t do anything. And so after that, I said, you know what, I’m done with this. I’m going to research and see if I can find a holistic approach. And that’s what ended up doing it is. I ended up going on drinking spearmint tea for about a month straight, two cups a day. And it lowered my testosterone enough that we got pregnant after one month.

Hilary Erickson [00:04:06]:

What? Okay, so what type of a doctor did you see that told you this, or did you just find that on the internet?

Morgan [00:04:13]:

I am a research guru. Like, I will just go and go and go until I find something. I have tried saw, palmetto, milk thistle, all kinds of vitamins. I’ve done research in actual physical books, which you don’t see very much anymore, and online and just combing through. And finally I saw research done on spearmint tea about lowering your androgens which has been linked to PCOS and high testosterone. And it’s believed that it lowers it enough where you’re able to actually release an egg. And it’s not that hidden egg syndrome. And one month full and apparently I released an egg and I was able to get pregnant.

John [00:04:57]:

That was it.

Hilary Erickson [00:04:58]:

Were you not ovulating before?

Morgan [00:04:59]:

No, apparently never ovulated in my entire life.

Hilary Erickson [00:05:04]:

Well, and there’s not really a downside for trying that other than, I guess, wasting time if you want to try something more aggressive.

Morgan [00:05:10]:

Yeah. And we were kind of at our end. You always think hope is a great thing until you are trying so long that it becomes painful. Like hope as a painful thing.

John [00:05:23]:

Every month gathering around the pee stick just, ugh… it was so awful, especially for Morgan.

Morgan [00:05:32]:

And we were actually like we had just moved to North Georgia and I said, we’re going to try a new doctor with Insemination one more time and then if that doesn’t happen, we’re going to adopt. We had started the nursery, we had started looking up adoption in Georgia. And then I was like, you know what, I’m going to try this spearmint thing too, and see what happens. And I turned my Insemination appointment into a I am like eight weeks pregnant appointment.

Hilary Erickson [00:05:58]:

I bet that is a lot cheaper. Yeah. That’s amazing. Yeah. I just think fertility is complicated. That’s a bummer.

John [00:06:11]:

It’s either concerningly simple, like way too easy, or insanely complicated.

Morgan [00:06:18]:

Yeah.

Hilary Erickson [00:06:19]:

I mean, that is really the truth. And all of parenting is like that because then of course, you get the people online that are like, I can’t believe you said that this baby is driving you crazy. When I would give anything for a baby, but I’m like, right, but it still drives you crazy. Yes.

Morgan [00:06:32]:

And that’s something that I did myself is I would see these people saying, oh my God, it took me so long. I didn’t get pregnant for two months. I’m like, two months. I would love to have two months. Or the individuals that are saying like, oh, I’m done with pregnant. I’ve only been pregnant for two months and I just want this baby out of me already. I’m like, man, I’m loving this. I am absolutely adoring this. I am three trimesters in. I am bigger than I’ve ever been in my entire life. My feet can’t fit in any of my shoes, but I feel the most beautiful I’ve ever felt and I absolutely freaking love it. And if that’s because of the infertility and having to try so long, I don’t know, but definitely a different experience. Yeah.

Hilary Erickson [00:07:14]:

You just have to appreciate people for where they are and not compare it to whatever you’re going through, which is very hard as a human being, but I love that. And I do agree that we had about three years of infertility with our last baby, which of course everyone’s like, you already have two kids and that’s not infertility. But I was like, well, I’d really like to either get on them with my light, I want to pee, or get off the pot at this point, but my pelvis split. I was twelve days overdue. And I really don’t think I don’t think I could have done that with like another little person. I had to haul on my hip. And I think I was more okay with all of the crap because it was something that I had tried so hard and wanted. That being said, I do see people who are like, I love my infertility baby more. I don’t think that that’s true. I mean, I like her more because she’s nicer, because she’s a girl.

John [00:08:09]:

That’s so funny.

Morgan [00:08:10]:

Yeah, I think definitely the baby love is probably equal across the board. I hope it is. It’s just a matter of do they like themselves when they’ve got full body eczema and the puffy feet and stuff and it’s like, I don’t know, maybe trying so long gives you more of just kind of, I’m going to be able to deal with anything you throw at me kind of thing.

Hilary Erickson [00:08:37]:

Yeah, you’re probably just more tolerant because you’ve been dealing with other things the whole time and you decided it was something you really wanted versus the prom date baby anyway. Moving okay. So how did you prepare for labor?

Morgan [00:08:53]:

Well, six plus years definitely gives you some time. I was actually a Pinterest fanatic… Way-

John [00:09:05]:

Back when she started boards and researching like seven years ago. She’s a very extremely meticulously, organized person that comes to this kind of thing.

Morgan [00:09:16]:

Yeah. So I’ve been combing pinterest boards for those six plus years, finding anything I could. And so when we finally found out that we were pregnant, I took all of those pinterest boards and lists, and I compiled them into what I call my baby encyclopedia, which is a Google document. So that it’s searchable. I mean, just everything under the sun.

John [00:09:40]:

Especially useful for husbands.

Morgan [00:09:43]:

Yes, especially useful for husbands. It’s searchable.

John [00:09:46]:

Who hasn’t been looking at those documents for six years?

Morgan [00:09:49]:

No, not at all. And with that, I was able to say, okay, here’s our bags for labor. I’ve got my bag, I’ve got dad’s bag, I’ve got baby’s bag. We’re taking our tours to the hospital. We are talking to all of the doctors that are involved in labor and delivery. We’re asking the hospital questions that we have a list of questions for very readily prepared. And then I even had my birth plan ready. I had my will actually ready. I had a list of all of my medications.

John [00:10:20]:

I wanted to laminate it, but she thought to be silly, just be able to hand out to the nurses. So, yeah, the willie laminate the will.

Hilary Erickson [00:10:30]:

Yeah, exactly.

John [00:10:31]:

Bronze that.

Morgan [00:10:32]:

Well, I had a list of everything I needed, and I got it done, and by the time we are ready to go, we’re about, I want to say, a couple of months out. And what we needed was a really good prenatal, and that’s where you came into play. And we took that class, or the course, I should say. And that was just like the cherry on top that instilled in me so much more confidence. It answered the questions that I still didn’t have answers for. And that way, when we were driving to the hospital, I knew what to expect if we were going the natural childbirth method or if we were going c section. So it really just made me feel a lot more comfortable, and I honestly don’t think how we could have been any more prepared other than for my silly body issues.

Hilary Erickson [00:11:18]:

John, what did you think of the class? Because husbands a lot of the times are like, I mean, I’ll do it for her.

John [00:11:26]:

Especially coming from that perspective. I tried to be I’m super ADD, and I’m self employed, too, so I’m always short on time. So I was going to do it, of course, but what I really appreciated was just how real you were, and you talk fast, which I like. It’s not like, so you’re thinking about getting pregnant. Here’s your first step. You’re not coming from a ground zero perspective, entry level, and the information was amazing, and it was fast. Yeah. Oh, and the humor, of course.

Morgan [00:12:02]:

Yeah, I appreciate the humor. In the course, you were talking about, like, I might not be your cup of tea. And I was like, man, you’re perfectly my cup of tea. That’s my sense of humor. Completely. And that made me even more engaged. It took the scariness out of it because labor is scary, especially if you are a chicken regarding pain. And so to have you instill that light heartedness while you’re also giving really good information just made it even better.

Hilary Erickson [00:12:30]:

Yeah. I mean, I just think you either can laugh or cry about it.

Morgan [00:12:34]:

Right.

Hilary Erickson [00:12:35]:

Because it is scary. I’m scared when I go in to have my babies, and I try and laugh through it. Although I will say that one of my babies, she was like, oh, I think the baby’s coming her. She’s done laughing. So then I was like, let’s make jokes.

Morgan [00:12:49]:

Yeah.

Hilary Erickson [00:12:50]:

All right. I’m glad that you guys love it. I will say that I think my class appeals to people that are planners, because if you just want to go in and feel all the feelings I don’t know, like, I just got back from a mom conference where I met a few other different childbirth educators and kind of their take on birth. It’s a lot about natural childbirth for them instead of knowing what’s going to go on at the hospital, because when you’ve done it, as long as I have as many states as I have, you know that this is pretty much what you’re all going to experience.

John [00:13:20]:

Yeah. Your experience level just was so reassuring, and it’s so much better than just reading through another form and getting 30 different opinions from people who may or may not know what they’re talking about.

Hilary Erickson [00:13:37]:

All right, Morgan and John, what did you guys learn about yourself in labor? Because I think sometimes people I mean, I think it’s an experience that prepares us in some ways for parenthood. What do you guys think?

Morgan [00:13:49]:

Man, I learned so much. Well, I will say that I relearned that, like I said before, I am a chicken with pain and that I will never, ever do natural childbirth. That is a choice for me. I got a little taste of contractions without epidural, and not for me. No. I will take the epidural every okay.

Hilary Erickson [00:14:15]:

You know what is worse for a labor nurse is when someone comes in and goes, I have an extremely high pain tolerance. Because people I swear that say that out loud don’t.

John [00:14:25]:

That’s what I learned.

Morgan [00:14:29]:

Yeah. Honestly, when they told me that John had to leave the room, I was so panicked. I was like, you said that in your course a little bit for the epidural. I confirmed it with them, and I was like, I don’t like this. I’m not liking this.

John [00:14:45]:

But thankfully, through all appointments, even just regular OB appointments, I’m usually there next door holding her hand because it’s just.

Hilary Erickson [00:14:54]:

They made John leave for the epidural?

Morgan [00:14:56]:

Yeah. And I mean, thankfully, it was really you just feel the shot to numb you, and it’s a pinch. It’s not bad at all. Even me coming saying I have no pain tolerance, it was not bad. The contractions were by far worse. And then once you get that epidural flowing through, it’s a cakewalk.

Hilary Erickson [00:15:15]:

Yeah. Leaving the room for the epidural seems on and off. Prior to COVID, I think most places allowed it, and then during COVID I think they just got used to it, which I think is a little bit annoying. I guess there’s safety factors.

Morgan [00:15:29]:

Yeah, I know. We got two answers for why a husband had to leave the room. The first one was like, health, we don’t want it contaminated because we’re putting this in your spine. And okay, but if he’s standing in front of me right. And then the second one was, well, we don’t want husband fainting. Yeah.

Hilary Erickson [00:15:50]:

That’s why we make you sit in a chair.

John [00:15:53]:

Liability insurance.

Morgan [00:15:54]:

If he’s in front of me again, just let me hold his hand. That’s a bummer.

Hilary Erickson [00:16:00]:

But if people are listening, I would push. I would probably push back on that a little bit, but at the same point, you’re like, just get in the epidural. I don’t even care. I don’t want to push because I just want it in my back. Morgan, I was going to say that if we gave you an epidural right now, you’d probably think it hurt more because you aren’t contracting.

Morgan [00:16:14]:

Yeah, comparatively. Yeah, probably. I mean, the nurses were great. They held my hand, they told me I was doing good, really trying to help me through it. So it was a better experience than I had anticipated with the pain, because I do not like shots.

Hilary Erickson [00:16:33]:

What did you do when they made you leave? Did you go get something to eat?

John [00:16:36]:

Just paced, which is what I do even during non stressful situations. If I’m not on a video call like we’re looking at right now, I’ll pace in a five foot circle. So that’s just so they went up to the waiting room and paced or up some carpet.

Hilary Erickson [00:16:52]:

Yeah, there’s plenty of pacing in that.

John [00:16:54]:

Exactly. We had an interesting hospital experience overall. It was like we ended up being there for four days, so it was like going to summer camp. We got to know every single nurse, went through multiple OBS. We really got to know everybody.

Morgan [00:17:11]:

Anything birth plan out the window that was going back. That’s another thing I learned, is that I have a really hard to find cervix. Apparently, it’s like, what do you call it? What? It was like the Pharaoh’s tomb. It’s like all it’s booby trap.

Hilary Erickson [00:17:33]:

Going into the mummy.

John [00:17:35]:

Yeah.

Morgan [00:17:35]:

It’s just really hard to find. And so that was wonderful. And then also found out, unfortunately, that my insemination had created scar tissue on my cervix. And so no matter what they did, I would not dilate.

John [00:17:53]:

Two days of every kind of everything you can give.

Hilary Erickson [00:17:59]:

Yeah.

Morgan [00:17:59]:

And I wouldn’t dilate. And I actually didn’t feel any contractions until my water broke. So that was definitely another kind of learning experience.

John [00:18:08]:

Yeah. Two days, I’m watching the contractions go up and down on the monitor and googling, how to read these. Read this. I was like, okay, this is a little bit higher. And it’s like pre labor level. And you’re sure you’re not feeling anything? No, I’m not feeling anything. Water broke.

Morgan [00:18:28]:

Yeah, it went from zero to 60.

Hilary Erickson [00:18:31]:

But did you guys end up having a vaginal birth or C section?

Morgan [00:18:34]:

No, c section. It wouldn’t dilate. And they tried all those different methods that you talked about in your course. They were going to try to go in there and prick the water. She was looking for any kind of opening. After they both did the vaginal and oral dilation medication, just nothing worked. And so finally, after two days, they said, we’re going to have to go in there and get him. He’s starting to show signs of distress. Yeah.

Hilary Erickson [00:19:01]:

So people that are listening, sometimes your cervix gets a scar thing, and if you melted the middle of a rubber band, that’s kind of how I think about it. It just won’t stretch. That’s kind of how I think of that section of cervix. And so sometimes we can somehow break it, and sometimes it just doesn’t. And that can happen if you have, like, a comb biopsy, any cervical surgery, or apparently an IVF where they poked your cervix.

Morgan [00:19:27]:

It was insemination. And it was this doctor that had kind of been doing this for probably 40 years, kind of set in his ways. And he went in there, and I think he scraped something. And not to get TMI, but I was in pain, and I actually bled for about a week and a half after. And that’s weird. That’s what did it. Yeah.

Hilary Erickson [00:19:49]:

I don’t know anything about insemination. I’m not the insemination nurse.

John [00:19:54]:

It wasn’t like it was the first time either. It was probably the third or fourth time that he had done it.

Morgan [00:20:00]:

And they were all uncomfortable. Well, they were all uncomfortable, but that one was nothing. Lifting me off the table. Lifting me off the table. And afterwards, I told the nurse, I said, I’m in a lot of pain right now. And his response was, you just need to go to the bathroom. So I was like, all right, John, let’s go. And that’s when I started my holistic journey. Not to say that insemination doesn’t work for some people, but apparently it’s not supposed to be painful.

Hilary Erickson [00:20:27]:

I have no idea. But that’s interesting. Maybe probably people at home might be saying, oh, that happened to me, too. So it’s something to know if you’ve had previous things done in your cervix uterus area, that it can be an issue, but it’s pretty rare, all things considered.

Morgan [00:20:42]:

Lucky gal.

Hilary Erickson [00:20:43]:

Morgan I know, right?

Morgan [00:20:44]:

Just one right after the other.

Hilary Erickson [00:20:48]:

Okay, guys, what is the worst part of having a baby at your house? Let’s be honest. Because you’re postpartum for the rest of your life.

Morgan [00:20:55]:

Worst part? I wouldn’t say worse. I would say definitely difficult. The thing that comes to my mind is the very simple things that you don’t even generally think about. Like, okay, I’m going to go and just do the dishes real quick. I’m going to go and do a load of laundry. I’m going to just go outside and water my plants or go to the bathroom. It’s like, now you have to think about, okay, when has he been fed? When has he been changed? Can I actually take him with me? If I take him with me, am I carrying him and I put him in a carrier? It’s all this planning that goes into it. And then the other thing that sticks out is for me, I’ve been with John for so long. He’s my best friend, but this is the first time in kind of our life together where I have to think about what our relationship is like now. It changed. There are times that I got really annoyed with him for certain things that I hadn’t in the past.

Morgan [00:21:52]:

This is news to me, this is all live, I have never heard of this.

Hilary Erickson [00:21:56]:

Don you and Drew can talk off air.

John [00:22:01]:

The scars aren’t physical, but they are definitely emotional.

Hilary Erickson [00:22:05]:

It changes everything. And I think I always just came home and thought it was like having a new purse. Like, he would look so great when we went out places. I don’t know. I was dumb. I was really dumb. But I agree. Everything. How am I going to get a shower in? How am I going to use the restroom?

Morgan [00:22:22]:

How am I going to use the.

Hilary Erickson [00:22:23]:

Restroom while holding a baby in the restroom?

Morgan [00:22:26]:

Yes, I actually did have to go to the bathroom with him in my arms. That was interesting.

John [00:22:32]:

Oh, I have too. Especially being first time parents, and especially for those first, like those first few weeks and first month. It doesn’t matter how much due diligence you do and research and courses and stuff you take, you’re going to screw some things up and not even realize it until later. Like, hey, here’s how you should have been putting a diaper on correctly the last few weeks.

Morgan [00:22:58]:

Poor guy.

John [00:22:59]:

Basic stuff. I know. Like, basic stuff like, oh, that’s why he’s upset. That’s why we have pee all over the place. So many things. So many simple things that you just dial in and then yeah, everything’s turned on its head.

Morgan [00:23:17]:

Or like the stupid thoughts. It’s like, okay, I don’t want to hold him in my arms because when I go to the bathroom, I’m going to need those hands.

Hilary Erickson [00:23:22]:

But I really don’t want to put.

Morgan [00:23:23]:

Him on anything on the floor. The poor little guy. He’s going to be eye level with the toilet.

John [00:23:28]:

You get super resourceful. Super resourceful. Being a photographer, I’ve got, like, a lot of grip and gear laying around. This morning I used one of my rigged. Oh, my gosh, a magic arm that holds a little camera and rigged it so he could hold his bottle up while he’s sitting in a chair.

Morgan [00:23:49]:

You sent me a picture.

John [00:23:51]:

I just got off a phone call, a business call, and needed to write down a bunch of notes, but Morgan needed to hand them off. So yeah, you get resourceful.

Morgan [00:23:58]:

You do. Yeah.

Hilary Erickson [00:24:00]:

That doesn’t end. You keep having to get because their needs change. You don’t have to hold them in the bathroom, but how do you make sure that the lock works?

Morgan [00:24:09]:

Yeah, his little bathtub. His little bathtub has come in so handy other than giving him bath. That’s what we use when we need our shower. When we need to just put him down his little bathtub with a little comfort, like he’s got a little squishy mat in it. It works. Yeah.

John [00:24:23]:

I get why only six weeks in now. I really get why parents talk about the purchases and what they buy, like, what works and what doesn’t. You can really geek out on the gear because it really makes a big difference. We’ve bought at least two or three versions of baby slings now, too. Just like the indoor one, the outdoor one, the working one. Yeah. That stuff all really makes a huge difference as far as quality of life and usability.

Morgan [00:24:54]:

Yeah.

Hilary Erickson [00:24:55]:

And the hard thing is, it’s different for everybody. Like, I loved my changing table because I had a fourth degree on my first baby, and I could not get on the floor to change him. So then I loved my changing table, and then I just got used to it. But so many people hate the changing table. They think it’s completely useless. And don’t even get me started on slings. I bought so many slings and I was like, I cannot use a wrap sling. I don’t have enough skills. Right.

Morgan [00:25:21]:

It’s ridiculous. And here’s the sad thing. This was another prep that we did. We had a night where we took both of our boba wraps. I think that’s what they’re called, boba wraps. And he and I were like, okay. We actually went and bought flour, like, actual flour that you would do in high school to make it like you have a child.

Hilary Erickson [00:25:38]:

We bought five simulates away.

Morgan [00:25:42]:

We geeked out on this part. And so he and I are doing these wraps. We’re learning it, and we’re putting this flower in the front of us. And he actually did it way better than I did. And I was just like, I can’t see we looked like Jedis. We looked cool.

Hilary Erickson [00:25:55]:

But could it hold a child?

Morgan [00:25:58]:

No, it could not hold a child safely.

Hilary Erickson [00:26:02]:

I feel you. I 100% feel you. Although then I look at these moms who are just like, Boom, boom, boom. It’s, like, whipped up. And I’m like, bless your hearts. That’s not my gift.

Morgan [00:26:10]:

And they’re doing it in public. They’re doing it one handed. They’re throwing it around. I mean, it’s amazing. Yeah. Kudos to them.

John [00:26:17]:

That’s another lesson that we’ve learned for God willing. Our second one is that just in general, be prepared. Obviously, don’t make all your purchases of the week of, but don’t over buy, because some of the stuff just you’re going to find out what you like and what you don’t like. You don’t want to be out of all that money.

Morgan [00:26:36]:

Definitely have a list now.

Hilary Erickson [00:26:38]:

Yeah. And I love second hand because then if you don’t love whatever, wrap. Like, I only use my Bjorn for, like, four months or whatever, but I loved handing it off to a friend to borrow it for their four months so that it feels so wasteful. Okay, what’s the best part of having a baby at your house? We’ll end on the positive.

Morgan [00:26:58]:

I would say the best part is just those moments like he’s just now smiling.

Hilary Erickson [00:27:05]:

Love baby smiles.

Morgan [00:27:07]:

Oh, my gosh. You get to see his eyes light up when he smiles and he sounds like he’s giggling. And when you’re sleeping and you pull him onto your chest and it’s quiet in the house and it’s just like you two laying there. It’s your capacity for love and it’s so content. It’s more than you could ever, ever imagine. And then, of course, seeing your partner with the child as well is just phenomenal.

Hilary Erickson [00:27:34]:

Yeah, it’s amazing. John, what’s your favorite part?

John [00:27:38]:

I mean, I think she nailed it. Morgan nailed it. We’re pretty touchy feely types, big heart type people. So I thought we were already kind of halfway there with the level of love that we could feel. The capacity for it. They have no clue. No clue. Until you actually hold your child, watching him come out of his momma’s tummy, it just like I have no words. Like, I have no words. It’s so amazing and overwhelming and beautiful and crazy.

Morgan [00:28:13]:

Yeah. And here is talking now, his little cooing and stuff like that. Oh, my God, he’s making a gift.

Hilary Erickson [00:28:18]:

For you in his diaper. I think you love me so much you can change my pants.

Morgan [00:28:27]:

We unfortunately call that making biscuits. He’s making us biscuits. That’s what he’s doing. Sorry. To those who love biscuits.

Hilary Erickson [00:28:35]:

I like biscuits.

Morgan [00:28:36]:

I do.

John [00:28:38]:

I like his biscuits better than actual biscuits.

Hilary Erickson [00:28:44]:

Well, you guys, I’m so glad that your spearmint tea made a happy ending for you. Yes, that seems very worth. The box of herbal tea or several boxes.

Morgan [00:28:56]:

Yes. I definitely left a review on Amazon and it got 127 likes, so I’m hoping somebody out there has also found some happiness from it.

John [00:29:07]:

Yeah, it’s so cool when something just so basic and holistic can be a total stopgap. All medical science was swinging and missing for years. You really have to be your advocate, I think, Hillary, you mentioned that a few times how much you talk about, like, informed consent, too. Just like, really be an advocate for yourself. And learn as much as possible.

Hilary Erickson [00:29:33]:

The annoying thing is you almost have to learn it that day.

Morgan [00:29:36]:

Right.

Hilary Erickson [00:29:37]:

Because I don’t think I went into the course about cervical cigar tissue because I don’t want to freak people out. That’s going to be me or what.

John [00:29:49]:

A C section actually is. I’m really glad we found that out after the fact.

Hilary Erickson [00:29:54]:

After it can’t be just a horror show.

John [00:29:59]:

I totally agree. Totally agree. No.

Morgan [00:30:02]:

Yes. And I will say when they told me, okay, get ready for your C section, I was ready. I didn’t feel any fear. You had really, like I said, instilled that confidence. I was just ready to have him out into the world, and so I felt no fear. I think John, if anything, was the one that was a little nervous because he has to wait there for 45 minutes while they prep me.

John [00:30:23]:

Oh, yeah. Just sitting there in the room in the silence, just waiting there for, like it was like, 30 minutes with our new OB, who we had never met, shift had just changed. So, like, our doctor, who we’ve been working with for nine months, walks out the door, new guy shows up, and 30 minutes later he’s like, okay, baby showing distress. We’re going in. I’m like, oh, crap. What the hell is that? Okay, what does that even mean? We don’t have time to figure it out. We’re going in. But you have to stay here and sit in this room for a while.

Hilary Erickson [00:30:52]:

Yeah, I mean, two things. Good news is that doctor at least was fresh.

Morgan [00:30:56]:

Yes.

Hilary Erickson [00:30:59]:

You’re like, right? Like, everything good. We’re not going to go with our bladder, right?

Morgan [00:31:04]:

Oh, he was a tripper.

Hilary Erickson [00:31:06]:

I have to tell you that. As a nurse, one of my favorite things to do was to go in and get the dad, because as soon as they would see me, they’d be like, it’s time I finally got to go. Thank goodness. Ever that happy to see me in my real life. No teenagers eyes light up.

John [00:31:20]:

I know.

Hilary Erickson [00:31:20]:

Seriously.

John [00:31:21]:

Better than Publishers Clearinghouse showing up at the door.

Hilary Erickson [00:31:26]:

Well, guys, thank you so much for coming on and sharing your story. I think a lot of people are going to hear this and they’re going to be saying, me too. All that makes sense. Yes. Yes. So I think every time we hear somebody else’s vulnerable story like this, it just helps people feel less alone and more excited for what the future can hold for them. So thank you for coming on. I sure do appreciate it.

Morgan [00:31:47]:

Of course.

John [00:31:48]:

Definitely help you so much.

Hilary Erickson [00:31:49]:

Just keep loving that little guy.

Morgan [00:31:52]:

Yes, definitely will. Thank you so much for the course that you put together.

John [00:31:56]:

I mean, seriously, the highlight out of all of our research and courses and everything, yours was just the highlight.

Hilary Erickson [00:32:03]:

All right, thanks so much, you guys. Thanks for coming on.

Morgan [00:32:06]:

Thanks, Hillary.

John [00:32:06]:

Thanks, Hilary. Take care.

Hilary Erickson [00:32:07]:

Okay. I hope you guys enjoyed this episode. Super interesting about the infertility. If any of you guys are out there wondering about it, feel free to comment on Instagram. Maybe we can get a conversation started over there. If anything, I just think it was so great how prepared she got and how they kept hope, and I think preparing can only help you out, and it sure seemed to help them out. So thank you so much for coming on Morgan and John. And of course, come join us in the online prenatal class for couples where we prepare you from bump to bassinet in just a few hours. Thanks for joining us on the Pulling Curls Podcast today. If you like today’s episode, please consider reviewing, sharing, subscribing. It really helps our podcast grow. Thank you.