I couldn’t write this whole self-righteous “smart” moms series without saying that there are PLENTY of things that I do that are REALLY stupid. DUMB, DUMB things! Here’s my top 10 things dumb moms do:
Don’t Leave Margins
I need edges in my life so that I can bleed into that area if I need to. I need a few minutes to gather my thoughts, and I have an obsessive need to be on time or early to things. Having margins allows me to do all that without losing my mind. I can’t have my day scheduled to the max, it’s just dumb to do it {and I have}.
BTW, this course is all about helping you make margins… and it rocks (and it’s free — sign up below):
Forget Your Husband
Love made you a mom, and a lack of love can make you resent so many things. You need to go on dates (even if that’s at home after the kids go to bed with just a frozen pizza and a netflix movie), you need to talk to him. It’s so important. It’s just dumb to forget your husband amidst the chaos that is your motherhood {and I have… and I’ve wanted to kill him}
Placing Things Over People
I think this one comes in many forms. Working too much, fretting over the things in your life vs your kids. Vacations you need or things your kids need, or worrying about where the money for Christmas is going to come from. Do your kids need better/more/newer clothes? NO, your kids need you and what you’re able to give them. By worrying about things you can give less of you. It’s just dumb to do it {and I have}.
Forgetting You’re a Woman
I’m not sure the best way to frame this, but the truth of the matter is that I feel 100% better when I have put clothes on that I feel good in, add some makeup and thing “hey, good lookin'” in the mirror. I feel like I have a better front for the people I will meet, even if it’s just little faces. I’m not saying that EVERY day is this way, but I try to make the majority of days that way. It’s just dumb to spend every day in your pajamas {and I have}. Check out my beauty and fashion posts here.
Not Being Consistent
My mom actually chimed this one in at me while I was writing this at her house. 🙂 But, I think it’s 100% true — you need to draw a line that you can hold, and if you can’t hold it — don’t draw it. Kids need to know they can count on you, in good times and bad times. You’re their rock (even if you feel a sponge).
Stop Doing Their Hobbies
You’re still you. If you liked photography before you had kids, make time for it now. If you enjoyed reading before, make sure to join a reading group! You’re still you. And don’t forget it. It’s just dumb to forget who you are {and I have}.
Isolate
Don’t feel like you’re in this alone. I remember when I had my first I holed up in my apartment. I REALLY could’ve used a library day or a walk. I could’ve used a friend, but my ward was horrible and I tried but I was so depressed I stopped short of trying very hard. Get out there, make friends. Find your village, villages don’t usually find you. It’s dumb to wallow in alone-ness when there’s a whole world of women doing the same things you are {and I have}. I did a girls trip last spring and it. was. amazing!
Let Little Things Get in The Way
Back to isolate, half of the reason I didn’t get out is because we lived on the 3rd floor and it was to hard to deal with a baby and a stroller. I also couldn’t work our car seat and get it in the car. I remember spending 30 minutes once, trying to get it to hook in. Ready to bawl my eyes out. Why on earth didn’t I go down to the car and figure it out (or why the heck didn’t I just buy a new one, or borrow one from a friend! #prideful). I wish I hadn’t let that little thing get in the way. That was a tough year because of it. It’s dumb to let small things make it so you can’t get to the big things {and I have — obviously}.
Stop Exercising
SO GUILTY OF THIS. But I just got a new video that I’m going to start doing. Take care of yourself. Get some natural endorphins! Really, if you’re feeling out of it, give it a try — and message me on Facebook to tell me that you loved it and I should get off my butt and do something too! It’s dumb to forget your own health to “help” your family {and I have}{and I am right now — shame on me!}
I am a big fan of the Moms into Fitness app (not sponsored, just a fan).
Get in a Rut
Making the same thing for dinner, always going to the same places. Try something NEW! My husband and I love trying new restaurants and I love trying a new recipe. Try something new! Your mind will thank you for it! It’s dumb to keep doing the same sad things over and over {and I have}
Box Themselves In
I remember when we moved here I was so frustrated that Drew was working so much, who would do the yardwork? Newsflash. ME If you want something done, do it yourself! I’m the queen of the drip system, who knew I would ever put that in my wheelhouse? Not me, that’s for sure! It’s dumb to think you can’t do something {and I have} — you are amazing
I mean, this list could go on forever, but these are the first ones I thought of. Now it’s your turn. I want you to comment below or tell me on my Facebook page — which one are you guilty of most? Is there something I missed, tell me!
Well, and obviously, the dumbest thing of all is not signing up for my newsletter. 🙂
[thrive_leads id=’52271′]
**{Dumb} Moms is a relative term. I had to give it a name, but I am the first one to say I’m not smart OR dumb ALL the time. Life is full of smart and dumb moments — These are just some things I find helpful when I’m smart about.. This series is just a list of things I’ve found to make life easier — not to say — WOOT WOOT, I’m SOooooOOOO smart! {said like Steve Martin}
Check out all my other {smart} moms posts:
[pt_view id=”4256a9870e”]
Jessica [Havok] says
While my mom is no longer really playing the mom role, she can attest that not keeping up with your hobbies is no good way to live. For a long time, she just didn’t make time for herself (and, also, this is during her after me moving out) because she had a long commute, had to keep up with the house, her significant other and what he was doing and dinner and the dogs, and then it was time for bed! But lately, she has been making more time for herself and doing things she enjoys, and she’s much better off for it. It’s easy to say that there’s just no time (and in her case, there really wasn’t a whole lot of it to be had), but you can’t just give up. You *will* get in a rut and you *will* suffer in one way or another because of it.